Working for the unmentionable

I can't believe I'm actually writing a piece for Tesco Magazine.

I abhor Tesco so completely that I won't shop there, much to Dug's dismay. They are such a bunch of scumbags that I refuse to give them my money, and here I am taking the Tesco dollar. Now that I come to think of it, that is exactly how it should be.

I was pleased to meet a school mum the other day who hates Tesco even more unreasonably than I do, and whereas I do very occasionally darken their doors, flagelating myself and vowing never again, she won't even do that. There's nothing like nursing a grudge to keep you entertained.

The only good use for the word Tesco that I have come across recently was hearing Lily Allen rhyming it with 'alfresco' in her genius little song LDN.